By F. Luis Casasus, General Superior of idente missionaries
Commentary on the Sunday Gospel of 27-8-2017, Twenty-first Sunday in Ordinary Time (Book of Isaiah 22:19-23; Letter to the Romans 11:33-36; Saint Matthew 16:13-20)
The pessimistic German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer, while visiting a greenhouse, became so absorbed in contemplating a plant that his peculiar behavior prompted the concern of an attendant. Who are you? the attendant asked suspiciously. Schopenhauer replied, Sir, if you could only answer that question for me, I’d be eternally grateful.
Similarly, someone once asked English philosopher Bertrand Russell if he would be willing to die for his beliefs. Of course not, he replied. After all, I may be wrong.
Now all of this would be funny if it were not so sad. How is it possible that the one discipline charged with discovering the answers to the questions of life should fail so completely in its mission? Is the greatest discovery of the “lovers of wisdom” that wisdom is not discoverable at all?
This may be the case, even for such distinguished thinkers. At least, it seems a hopeless task for our limited experience, insight, integrity and knowledge, no matter what our achievements and efforts have been in these dimensions of life. We really need the grace to fully understand and be consistent with our identity: Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah. For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my heavenly Father. Nothing less than a confession in the divinity of Christ is required if we are to stay firm in times of trials and scandals. If our faith is more than in a human person called Jesus, but also that He is the Son of God, our Good Shepherd, then we will be able to overcome all things in life.
When we say to Mary the prayer our Father Founder taught us, Pray for us sinners, so that we may be saints, we are expressing our continuing difficulty in being who we are…saints! Remember the original Christian meaning of saint, any believer who is “in Christ” and in whom Christ dwells, someone who has been “set apart”. Set apart for what? A better question is, Set apart for whom? And the answer is, for God.
Yes, this is the extraordinary experience of Saint Peter: a rash fisherman becomes the rock on which the church is founded, is given the keys to the kingdom of heaven, and receives some significant spiritual power. Why? Because when Jesus asks the disciples who they think he is, Peter responds that Jesus is the Messiah.
But this is also our experience and we join Saint Paul in his words of today’s second dreading: Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How inscrutable are his judgments and how unsearchable his ways! Every time you and I sincerely accept that Jesus is the Messiah (= the one chosen to lead the world and thereby save it) something happens in our heart, He responds with the specific grace we need in our spiritual moment.
Jesus told His disciples not to publicize Peter’s confession. The listeners must find out for themselves. It cannot be from a secondary source. This is a solid argument to understand the centrality of mystical life beyond our honest efforts.
A story is told of John XXIII who was Pope during the turbulent 1960s when it seemed that everything in the Church was falling apart. There was a crisis in the priesthood, in religious life, in married life, in faith, indeed in the Church. The Pope worked long and hard hours trying to address these problems. One evening, after an exhausting day in the office, he went to his private chapel to do his daily Holy Hour before retiring but he was too exhausted and too stressed out to focus or pray. After a few minutes of futile effort, he got up and said, Lord, the church belongs to you. I am going to bed.
Yes, the Church did and continues to belong to Christ. He is the builder even if Peter and each of us are the rocks on which the Church is built.
It is a good thing that I am not defined by my appearance, my strengths, my scars or my weaknesses. Jesus says who we are and He says that in Him, we are Blessed, Chosen, Adopted, Accepted, Redeemed, Forgiven and Loved.
If we are faithful to our Ascetical-Mystical Examination we will be in a position to advance in our psychological maturity, a necessary condition to grow toward maturity in our daily walk through Him, with Him, in Him. If we compare the attitude of Saint Peter in some moments of his life (his denial of Christ, his abrupt reactions) with his Letters, his works and his willingness to die for Jesus, we notice that a profound psychological and emotional maturity accompanied and paved the way for his progressive and exemplary closeness to God.
It is very important for rectors, for spiritual directors and for all of us to be aware of our lack of emotional maturity, to clear the way to a healthy spiritual, religious and apostolic life. We all have emotional baggage to work through, but so few of us choose to do it, because it takes confronting yourself and changing things that are within you. It is a lifelong task that you never finish, because there is always something else that will pop up, once you think you have arrived.
Often, when someone has been hurt or mistreated, they put their walls up as a defense mechanism and it is hard for anyone to get close once that happens. Others become emotionally unavailable temporarily while they put various commitments above their relationships. Some signs of this lack of emotional maturity:
* Emotionally immature people are not interested in getting to genuinely know people. Whenever there is an opportunity to get more intimate (emotionally, spiritually) they become withdrawn. The connection will not run deeper than trivial matters or jokes. When you ask one of them questions about their personal life he does not answer or he quickly changes the subject. It comes down to the fact that he does not want you to know too much about his past. It could be that he is hiding something.
* Emotionally immature people like to keep themselves to themselves. They keep their past, fears, and dreams in their own heads where they feel it belongs.
* They are hard to read. An emotionally immature person will constantly confuse you with his mixed messages. One minute they seem sure of their feelings, and the next, they are cold and distant.
Sometimes, they struggle to understand their own wants and needs. But they have an even harder time trying to communicate this because of their fear of opening up.
* Emotionally immature people want to keep relationships casual. There are many “advantages” to maintaining a casual relationship, but the main benefit is the no-commitment rule. Keeping a casual approach to things means that he can continue seeing you without feeling like he owes you anything.
* They do not like confrontation. Emotionally immature people will run at the first sign of trouble. Have you noticed that your arguments usually go unresolved? Does he run and hide instead of talking to you? The problem is he does not know how to deal with conflict, so he chooses to ignore it.
* They do not consider your feelings. They lack empathy. Does he ever ask you how you are feeling? Does he consider your own needs? If not, that is a red flag. They cannot put themselves in other people’s shoes.
* They lose their temper. Emotionally immature people often struggle with controlling their emotions. They either feel nothing or feel everything all at once; the latter can be like an explosion.
* They want to be in control. Being in control is very important to them. They crave it. And if they are not in control, then they feel like a fish out of water. Emotionally immature people rarely like to step out of their comfort zone. In their heads, everything should be exactly how they want it.
* They want everything to be perfect, nothing less. They have expectations of their neighbors that they expect them to meet. If you do one thing that they are not happy with, then they will use that as an excuse as to why they will never commit to you.
Everything said above is simply a description of some well-known experiences. But the most important thing is that we can trust God, who is taking care of the limitations (guilty or not guilty) of his disciples. He has an infallible remedy: Change the way you love me; feed my lambs, tend my sheep. To accept this has been always the key step towards maturity for all the saints, founders or martyrs. What about you and me?
If God has chosen us, He will qualify us.
We began with two bleak anecdotes to illustrate the need for the grace to be progressively aware of our identity. Let us say it more poetically:
A young girl named Jessica resided in a tiny, almost windowless house in a slum. She participated one day in a flower contest and won. One of judges asked her how she managed to grow and take care of her flower in such a difficult place. She told the judge that since she could not put her flower outside her house because somebody might steal it when she is not watching, she therefore had to keep her flower inside the house and put it in a corner where sunlight would enter through the house’s cracks. Jessica then opined to the judge: Light always seeks us. It enters through the cracks to reach us so that we would know what to do and understand who we are.
